What is Emotional Abuse? 

Emotional abuse is when a coach behaves in a way that is likely to seriously affect the athletes’ emotional development. It can range from constant rejection and denial of affection, through to continual severe criticism and deliberate humiliation. Emotional abuse is more subtle. Quite often such abuse goes unseen, as even the athlete does not recognize that he/she is being abused. However, it can be very damaging on one’s self confidence / self-esteem. As with studies, physical and sexual abuse is preceded by emotional abuse and then accompanied by emotional abuse. Emotional abuse occurs over a long period of time and psychologically begins to wear the athlete down until they just accept any form of abuse as its easier to do so. Emotional abuse occurs in either:

1.       Isolation:  

•  The abuser will control whom the athlete sees, where s/he goes, whom s/he speaks to and what s/he does for example not allowing the athlete to have a sexual partner 
•  Many abusers (coaches) justify their control over their athlete by stating that it is proof of their passion to help the athlete succeed in sport. 
•   The effect of this isolation is that the athlete feels very alone in their struggle – you are NOT alone – check our resources pages! (You are never alone!)

2.       Verbal Abuse: 

•  The abuser may use critical, insulting or humiliating remarks (i.e. you’re rubbish, you’re a crap athlete, you’re useless) 
• Withholding information / refusing to discuss issues with the athlete
• Verbal abuse undermines your sense of worth, your self-concept (i.e. who you think you are) by discounting your ideals, opinions or beliefs
• Verbal abuse can include:

                                          i.    yelling or shouting at you

                                         ii.    making threats

                                        iii.    insulting you or your family

                                        iv.    being sarcastic or mocking about or criticising your interests, opinions or beliefs

                                         v.    humiliating you either in private or in company

                                        vi.    sneering, growling, name-calling

                                       vii.    withholding approval, appreciation, or conversation

                                      viii.    refusing to discuss issues which are important to you

                                        ix.    laughing or making fun of you inappropriately

                                         x.    leaving nasty messages

                                        xi.    accusing you of unfaithfulness, not trying hard enough

                         xii.    blaming you for his/her failures or other forms of abuse

                                      xiii.    stating your training is bad and you are a poor athlete

THIS LIST IS NOT EXHAUSTIVE! PLEASE DO REFER TO OTHER WEBSITES ON OUR LINKS PAGE TO GET MORE DEFINITIONS OF EMOTIONAL ABUSE

 FACTS on emotional abuse in youth sports: NYSSF

CoachAbuse.Com